Happy Birthday, Daddy Low!

Today is Daddy Low's birthday and stuck at home with no car keys and no special ingredients to make a super-duper dinner, I try to think what else would make a good present for him.

Light bulb! A blog entry - Daddy Low just grumbled yesterday that I never write anymore and that he likes to read my blog... so here it is, Papa! This is for you! :)

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We are back in UK after a 2+ week return to Singapore. Landed at 5.50am on Saturday. And amazingly, we agreed to a weekend packed full of activities. But planning to go to a birthday party at 1pm after having landed in early morning is pure madness and I ended up sending in notice of our absence with apologies, especially since J came back with a phlegmy cough and I with a burning sore throat and dry, persistent cough. 

We spent that Saturday by ourselves and it was a nice change for a bit from the meet-ups in Singapore. The foremost thought in my mind was to get J back to UK time and his routine, so the baby is the one who gets star treatment - play for a while, then breakfast, then shower, then nap etc.  (Although it was not the first time for us to see this, it was still funny to see J rediscovering his toys - his eyes would brighten up, there would be excited "ahs" and pointing at his toys while he crawls rapidly towards them. And every time, I am reminded how I ought to "rotate" his toys by keeping them in storage and taking them out in turn, so they are always novel and desirable to J :)

Then, of course, we had to do the grocery run to stock up the fridge, and unpack and do laundry... as well as call the parents on Skype to say we are safely home. Breakfast and lunch were takeaways, while I cooked dinner and Daddy Low returned to his workplace to clear some backlog. (And I cooked porridge for J for the first time! And it was not burnt; it did not taste odd, but was in fact really yummy! Yay!) And so our Saturday turned out to be quite tiring after all and all three of us slept very soundly that night - Yes! Even J - he slept through and did not wake up for his midnight feed! :)

Sunday's programme - a wedding in London! Not much of a lie-in for me, as I tried to keep J to his routine of waking up at 7am - and he did not need prompting anyway, woke up at 7am... but man, are we tired! I must admit, I half wished that we didn't have to go. The house was in a mess, I feel and look like a panda (and Daddy Low too) and was not in much of a mood to pretty up for a wedding or get into some interaction action... but one only marries once and a wedding is always a good way to catch up with old frens, so there we go again - packing baby's stuff, getting angpow ready, trying to look fresh and not like some wilted cabbage and bravely, Daddy Low stepped on the gas, propelling us towards London.


There is something about weddings - it always makes one go misty-eyed and all soft inside as the beauty of love pervades the air, while watching the couple exchange their vows. I could not see my friends' expressions as they exchange their vows, but I could hear the emotion in their voices and with each "I do", you could almost hear a sigh of contented bliss from the audience. It is hard to explain, but for one moment, the very building itself seems to join in the celebration with a slight throbbing of joy and happiness. 

This was an American-Swedish wedding and a first experience for me to hear three readings by the best man, the bridesmaid and the bride's aunt. They were excellent selections, all very relevant and I thought, made a lot of sense. As I listened to them, I was flooded with emotions. Probably like several others in the crowd, I am reminded of our own big day as I exchanged wedding vows with Daddy Low. I thought of how young we were then, how heady we were that particular day (According to the audience, I paused noticeably before responding to the Solemniser addressing me as "Mrs Low"), and how ignorant I was of how to be the right partner..

I have to say, after spending more than half a decade together as husband and wife, I am aware of how wonderful my husband is to me ... and how willful and selfish I am comparatively as a wife. Daddy Low gives in to me constantly and is always mindful of my feelings. Poor him, his wife is more wrapped up in her own world and needs ... and now that J is here, in J's needs :)  And many times too, this wife takes him for granted. He may complain, he may get mad, but at the end of the day, he still loves and accepts me. 


Lucky me.


I am thankful to have such a loving husband. And I am thankful that I am reminded today of his wonderfulness and of how a marriage can only be made with hard work and contributions from both.  Thank you, Daddy Low. You are the treasure I have the fortune to find in this life. And because I am not as articulate, and because I was so moved by the readings, I leave them here for us both...  love you and feeling blessed to have you and J in my life, your wife K :)




Extract from Les Miserables
by Victor Hugo



You can give without loving, but you can never love without giving
The great acts of love are done by those
Who are habitually performing small acts of kindness
We pardon to the extent that we love
Love is knowing that even when you are alone
You will never be lonely again
And the great happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved
Loved for ourselves
And loved in spite of ourselves



I Promise
by Dorothy R Colgan


I promise to give you the best of myself
And to ask no more than you can give.
I promise to respect you as your own person and to realise that
Your interests, your desires and needs are no less important than my own.
I promise to share with you my time and my attention
And to bring joy, strength and imagination to our relationship.
I promise to keep myself open to you, to let you see through 
The window of my world into my innermost fears and feelings, secrets and dreams.
I promise to grow along with you, to be willing to face changes
In order to keep our relationship alive and exciting.
I promise to love you in good times and in bad, with all I have to give and all I feel inside 
In the only way I know how.
Completely and forever.


The Act of Marriage
by Alfred Perdersen


A good marriage must be created.
In the marriage, the little things are the big things.
It is never being too old to hold hands.
It is remembering to say "I Love You" at least once a day.
It is never going to sleep angry.
It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives.
It is standing together and facing the world.
It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family.
It is speaking words of appreciation and gratitude in thoughtful ways.
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.
It is giving each other an atmosphere in which to grow.
It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.
It is not only marrying the right person,
It is being the right partner.