One of the advantages of being a SAHM is that you have the time to bring your baby to all sorts of activities. And one of the activities that I have always wanted to bring Julien to is baby massage. People do it for all sorts of reasons - to calm a colicky baby, to bond with baby, to hopefully help baby sleep longer hours etc. I just wanted us to do something together, and if Julien is like his parents, I know he would love a good massage!
Today is our 2nd session and we love it already. When we entered the room, Helen, our instructor, has already set up the mats and towels. We were each given a bottle of oil and printed handouts with diagrams showing the massaging actions that we would be executing. Every session, there is a focus area - the first session was on legs and today's session was on the tummy.
Helen was very friendly and approachable and definitely knew her stuff. Her instructions were clear, especially as she modelled the massage actions for us to see on her lifesize baby doll. But what I like most of all is how the sessions are so baby-centred, meaning the baby's needs come first - if Baby wants to feed, you feed; if Baby wants a diaper change, you change; if Baby wants to nap, let him nap. Helen will simply give us a baby doll to work with in the meantime or just observe her if we so choose. I think that really made us feel so comfortable, and not worry about missing out instead. After all, we are here to learn some massage techniques for our baby to feel relaxed and calm and not have both of us becoming all frazzled. And when the session has ended, Helen was more than happy to demonstrate again to those who could not do it, because they were earlier occupied with their babies.
Julien has been perfect on both occasions. In fact, Helen commented that he seemed to be all ready for the massage session, being so chill and just checking out his environment so calmly. The only time he made any noise today was because he was hungry. Once fed, he was happy again and was back to observing his surroundings serenely.
I had incorporated the massage into the bath routine and been giving Julien his leg massage after his bath a few times since the first session last week, but I am not sure he really noticed it. In fact, I thought it was probably best to do it separately than after the bath, since he sprayed me once after being exposed so long. Others in the class reported that their babies seem to sleep for longer stretches at night after starting on baby massage or being more calm. Jules has always been a more or less amiable baby, only crying when he has needs - feed, diaper change, want to sleep, too hot, too cold etc, so I guess we have not seen anything noticeably different, since he had no particular issues in the first place. But I do hope that as we do the massage more often, he would learn to recognise the actions and give me baby cues like offer me his other leg for massage when I am done with the first one.
But from what we have learnt in these two sessions, I sure wish I am a baby. It all feels so relaxing. In fact, I am thinking that I should play some relaxing music - we did buy some soothing baby music - and maybe even light a scented candle for our next massage. After all, we are already taking the trouble to do it, why not go the whole hog? Jules, you are one lucky baby!
Helen ended today's session with a reading of a poem about the importance of touch, which I found very true and touching. Whatever people may say about or maybe even booboo touch psychology, I think no one will disagree that touch is very important indeed, especially for a new little life just starting to explore and make sense of his world. I hope you like the poem as much as I do.
Helen ended today's session with a reading of a poem about the importance of touch, which I found very true and touching. Whatever people may say about or maybe even booboo touch psychology, I think no one will disagree that touch is very important indeed, especially for a new little life just starting to explore and make sense of his world. I hope you like the poem as much as I do.
Please Touch Me
If I am your baby, please touch me
I need your touch in ways you may never know
Don’t just wash and change and feed me
But rock me close, kiss my face and stroke my body
Your soothing and gentle ways says security and love.
If I am your child, please touch me
Though I may resist, even push you away
Persist, find ways to meet my needs.
Your goodnight hug helps sweeten my dreams
Your daytime touching tells me how you really feel.
If I am your teenager, please touch me
Don’t think that I am almost grown
I need to know that you still care
I need your loving arms, I need a tender voice
When the road gets rocky, then the child in me still needs.
If I am your friend, please touch me
Nothing lets me know you care than a warm embrace
A healing touch when I’m depressed assures me I am loved
And reassures me that I am not alone
Yours maybe the only comforting touch I get.
If I am your sexual partner, please touch me
You may think that your passion is enough
But only your arms hold back my fears
I need your tender reassuring touch
To remind me I am loved just because I am me.
If I am your grown-up child, please touch me
Though I may have a family of my own to hold
I still need Mummy and Daddy’s arms when I hurt
As a parent the view is different
I appreciate you more.
If I am your ageing parent, please touch me
The way I was touched when I was very young
Hold my hands, sit close to me, give me strength
And warm my tired body with your nearness
Although my skin is worn wrinkled, it loves to be stroked.
I need your touch in ways you may never know
Don’t just wash and change and feed me
But rock me close, kiss my face and stroke my body
Your soothing and gentle ways says security and love.
If I am your child, please touch me
Though I may resist, even push you away
Persist, find ways to meet my needs.
Your goodnight hug helps sweeten my dreams
Your daytime touching tells me how you really feel.
If I am your teenager, please touch me
Don’t think that I am almost grown
I need to know that you still care
I need your loving arms, I need a tender voice
When the road gets rocky, then the child in me still needs.
If I am your friend, please touch me
Nothing lets me know you care than a warm embrace
A healing touch when I’m depressed assures me I am loved
And reassures me that I am not alone
Yours maybe the only comforting touch I get.
If I am your sexual partner, please touch me
You may think that your passion is enough
But only your arms hold back my fears
I need your tender reassuring touch
To remind me I am loved just because I am me.
If I am your grown-up child, please touch me
Though I may have a family of my own to hold
I still need Mummy and Daddy’s arms when I hurt
As a parent the view is different
I appreciate you more.
If I am your ageing parent, please touch me
The way I was touched when I was very young
Hold my hands, sit close to me, give me strength
And warm my tired body with your nearness
Although my skin is worn wrinkled, it loves to be stroked.
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| Jules feeling zen before the session |
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| Starting the session by undressing the babies! |
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| Baby's sleeping, so practise with the dummy first! |
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