Today, 1 Sept, is Teacher's Day, and I received possibly the highest compliment a teacher could ever receive - a former student sent his greetings and told me I must have done a good job, because he just signed up to be a teacher with the Ministry of Education.
I am not sure how best to describe my reaction; I guess mixed feelings would do how I feel justice.
This is not to say I did not enjoy teaching in my decade-long career in education. In fact, I enjoy teaching very much. And as I look back now, I know I enjoy it because I like opening minds and helping students learn to question and explore topics that matter. As a junior college General Paper tutor, I had the opportunity to introduce real life issues to young adults and it never ceased to give me satisfaction whenever I see these 17, 18 year-olds gain an interest in "adult" issues such as globalization, poverty, human rights and start to question the status quo, consider other perspectives and engage in debate in the course of our study together. From indifferent youth, they have become engaged and dare I say, even possibly become more responsible adults. And it feels great to know that I played a part in their growing awareness of world concerns. More than anything, I feel I have done a good job if my kids leave my classroom at the end of our time together with a thirst for knowledge and continue to critically examine issues.
Hence, I guess I really ought to give myself a pat on the back, given that this particular student not only left my lessons with this positive learning attitude, but also with the desire to teach and to pass on that enthusiasm for knowledge, that fire for questioning.
Why then do part of me baulk at his news? Is it because I am a bit wearied by the profession, having seen its tedious side as well? Surely not, for the rational mind in me knows that every profession, every job has its flaws and less desirable bits. Is it because I think he may not be able to do a good job and I would have sent an unsuitable candidate to blight future students? Nope, he is, as far my memory serves me, an inquisitive and energetic young man with interesting questions and alternative perspectives, fully capable of enthusing his own class of young minds.
I guess when it comes to the bottomline, I feel the uncomfortable weight of responsibility on my shoulders. It is one thing to open young minds, but quite another to be the inspiration for someone's career choice, which, in my opinion, is a significant factor contributing to one's life experience. I am definitely happy that my teaching has had a positive impact on this student, and I can only hope that he will be happy with his decision in the long run.
And as I contemplate this, I come to realize that this is but the beginning. Teachers are like students' semi-parents, since our daily contact and teaching have a great influence on their development, academic and otherwise. However, at the end of the day, the students do go back to their own parents, and the teacher's responsibility becomes partially lessened.
Today, I am a parent myself and I now have a young mind of my own to guide and nurture. If I am to shy away from the weight of responsibility from a student who came merely to thank me (he did not, after all, demand that I be responsible for his decision), how can I sustain myself in my career as a parent? I see a long journey ahead of me as Mummy Low, with little Julien Low looking up to us for advice, opinions, discussions and I am determined to be there for him to the best of my ability as mother, mentor and educator.
And at the end of the day, I do have an escape clause - everyone must ultimately make his own decisions and take responsibility for his own actions. This is undoubtedly one of the most important lessons I must teach Julien. He can't always be Mummy and Daddy's boy; he has to grow up to be one who can make up his own mind with confidence and take ownership of his decisions and actions. Only then will he be able to face himself squarely and enjoy fully all that life can offer. And we, as parents, can then say to ourselves that it was indeed a job well done.
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